This
past week I was asked to give a talk on the role of the Catholic man in the
modern world. My message was simple:
commit to being good husbands and good fathers and take the reins of making
sure that your families walk in the footsteps of Christ. This is after all what St. Joseph did in the
life of Christ. He was a good husband
for he took Mary into his home and was a good father for he raised the Son of
God as is his own. During the talk, we
agreed that the commitment part always trips men up. We live in a culture where men avoid
commitment, where men want to be unattached and independent, so having to care
for a wife and children isn’t high on the list for most men. Yet, it is so necessary when you look at our
culture, at our young people and at our family.
This isn’t a misogynistic statement, just something that Pope Francis
has been preaching about the last two months:
we need to recover the sense of strong fathers in our society. The father has his role. The mother has hers. That is how God created it, and it has
gradually been deteriorating and being redefined. We need men, real men, real
committed men, to follow the example of St. Joseph and lead their families and
form their children to walk with the Lord. Real men who won’t shy away from the
responsibilities of fatherhood, but take on the challenge to reshape their
families in the image of the Holy Family.
We need good fathers, and the events of the past week showed us the
importance of having strong families in our country.
A
sermon was preached in a courtroom in Charleston, South Carolina on Friday
afternoon. I want to move beyond the
tragedy though to focus on the love and mercy that followed. Nine families were given the opportunity to
confront the young man who took their loved ones from them, and their responses
were far more powerful than any words that I can preach today. They were words of forgiveness. Forgiveness!
In a town, a state, and a region where this happens way too often and in
a time where vengeance and violence is the response to violence. These families came into courtroom armed with
the love and mercy of Jesus Christ. Here
are the words they directed at the young man:
A daughter said: “I just wanted everybody to know, to you, I forgive you,” “You
hurt me. You hurt a lot of people. May God forgive you. And I forgive you.”
Another family member said: “I
forgive you and my family forgives you, but we would like you to take this
opportunity to repent . . . confess, give your life to the one who matters the
most, Christ, so that He can change it—can change your ways no matter what
happens to you, and you will be OK. Do that and you will be better.”
A mother said: “We welcomed you
Wednesday night in our Bible study with open arms,” she said. “Every fiber in
my body hurts, and I will never be the same. . . . But as we said in Bible
study, we enjoyed you, but may God have mercy on you.”
These
are strong families that go to Emmanuel EAM Church in Charleston. Our church is united in prayer with their
church this morning because I cannot fathom the pain of what they must be going
through this morning as they go to church without a sense of normalcy. And no, it is not lost on me that their pastor
was taken from them. He was leading them
in the study of the Bible. Heroism
indeed. Being a good father. And this pastor taught his flock so
well. He taught them the power of the
mercy of Christ. He taught them that it
is far better to live in love than to live in hate. He ingrained in them the last verse of today’s
second reading: “So whoever is in Christ is a new creation: the old things have
passed away; behold new things have come.” New things have surely come, and this goes
beyond that blessed pastor. These new
things were preached by the families of that community who stood united in offering
forgiveness to a young man who society probably thinks deserves no such thing.
We need
strong families who continue to spread this message of mercy. And we need strong fathers who will teach
their children how to love and forgive.
So I want to finish on this Father’s Day with something beautiful we all
witnessed here last month. There’s a new
tradition that has begun among our newly ordained priests of presenting the
stole from their first confession to their fathers. Last month we saw Father Bryan give it to his
father during his First Mass. The reason
behind this gesture, Father Bryan explained and Father Michael said the same
thing the night before, was because their fathers were the first men who taught
these two would-be priests how to forgive: something so necessary for their ministry. You come to your father when you need
forgiveness whether it be you biological or spiritual father. You come to your father when you need
shelter, security, and a steady hand. It’s
what the disciples did in the gospel. In
the midst of the storm they cried out not knowing that God himself was in that
very boat riding with them in storm.
Jesus calmed the storms and reassured them. Lessons he no doubt learned from St. Joseph
and from his Father in heaven. We need
the steady hands of our fathers to take our families back to Christ. We need them to teach us forgiveness. We need them to not shy away from commitment,
for a real man, a real God-fearing man, realizes the gifts that God has given
to him and realized the importance of leading his wife and children to Christ.
And if you are blessed to be called a father, may you be blessed this day and
every day by our Heavenly Father, and by the intercession of St. Joseph, patron
of fathers, may you be a holy example of leadership, love and forgiveness for
you family and for a society who is in dire need of strong fathers and strong
families.
St.
Joseph, patron of all fathers, pray for
us.
